There are a total of just 11 kids in my daughter’s class, majority being boys with just four other girls, all mainly from Chinese or Burmese backgrounds. Those familiar with the typical South-East Asian kids are well aware that they usually run a rather tight study schedule. School is often followed by Math & Mandarin tuitions, piano lessons and art classes leaving them with absolutely no time for playdates or playmates.
My daughter and I had officially been banished from the mommy and me playgroup and planning any kind of after-school activities with her classmates had almost become impossible considering their hectic timetables. It was only then a new expat family moved into the estate. My daughter and I were beyond ecstatic because this family had a little girl just my daughter’s age. And they weren't Asian which meant no Chinese tuitions, Kumon classes and harsh after-school schedules.
I wasted absolutely no time in inviting them over and giving them a taste of my Indian hospitality comprising ginger chai and my famous bread pakoras. Very soon we were meeting every day. Her daughter spend almost every evening with us and most of weekends too having sleepovers and enjoying pajama parties. It didn't even bother me one bit that they hadn’t invited my family over even once. I didn't care and wasn't going to let something so petty come in the way of our wonderful and meaningful friendship. ‘It’s just a different culture.’ I (The same, me who created that whole drama over women not taking turns to host their share of playdates) justified to my daughter when asked why she wasn’t ever being invited over for a playdate at theirs. “There are no such formalities between close friends,” I told her.
I was happy. My daughter was happy and that was all that mattered. I was laughing again, being myself and lounging around by the pool with my new found friend sipping Mojitos while our little ones splashed around. Even our husbands got along well, which was rather rare.
I don’t even remember the number of mutton chops grilled and wine bottles opened to entertain our new found friends. Unfortunately the romance vanished almost as quickly as the bottles of cabernet in our mini bar. It all started to go downhill when my new found friend made a plan to go to the zoo. Yes the zoo and who knew something as harmless and innocent like a trip to the zoo was going to be the reason for my months and months of severe migraine and sleepless nights. A few of the other kids too got included in the plan and a sunny Sunday morning was decided as the D-day for our little picnic.
Just a day before the big day, the other kids-mind you on their own, got chatty about their little picnic plan and suggested it was better to go to an amusement park instead. They all had been to the zoo and the thought of rollercoasters and bumper cars sounded way more fun. My daughter too got excited and said she too would prefer the amusement park instead.
And I did what any other mom in my place would have done. Send a text asking if we should change the plan to go to the amusement park as the majority preferred it to the zoo. Now like they say… hell hath no fury like a mother scorned, my seemingly harmless suggestion got this momzilla to completely flip out. I was told off immediately for crushing her daughter’s dreams. Somehow we became the traitors who screwed them over for a better offer. Though I knew I had not done anything wrong and that my daughter would be heartbroken when I told her we weren't going to the park with the other kids, I did what I do every time to get out any sticky situations, I apologized my way out of this one too. I packed the best possible picnic lunch, Pinterest style, consoled my sobbing daughter, promising her that I would take her to the rollercoasters another day and set off to the zoo.
However me showing up with my best smile and my best cheese and ham sandwiches was just not enough to pacify this momzilla. She was pissed and my 7 year old constantly trying to sell the amusement park idea, despite my constant eye-rolling and head wobbling didn't help ease the situation either. There was even a time when the lady got so livid, she asked her driver to stop the car and asked my little one to get out and get her own ride to the amusement park. That should have been my moment, to put all that ghee, I had been consuming since I was a little girl to some good use and slap that smirk right off her face. But did I?? No I didn’t.
I continued as if nothing had ever changed between us until one day, the eventful day I would like to call the final nail in the coffin. I received an email from the same momzilla regarding a minor altercation between the girls. Now these two were best friends and just like any girls their age, they too had their share of good days and bad. They too had their share of laughs and drama. A normal mom would probably leave it alone and let the girls figure this one out. But oh no! Not the momzilla. So what does the momzilla do…?? What she does best. Be obnoxious launching lame threats at me and my little one. Apparently my daughter had made fun of her child's missing tooth and you would think that my constant apologies and assurance that something like this may never happen again would have settled the situation. But this momzilla was on a rampage and their was no calming her this time.
My seven year old was called a bully and I was called a bad parent for not teaching my kid some good manners. She went on and on. What she did not probably realize was that I too was a mom and that a momzilla in me lay dormant somewhere deep within. There was only so much of her bad-mouthing my little one, I was going to take at this point. Now I would have liked to walk up there and give her a sneak-peek into how dreadful the momzilla within me could be but instead I did the next best thing. I deleted her from my Facebook and my life. An online adieus was all I need to shut this one up once and for all.
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